sarah the bitch

im reaching a state of depression from looking into my future and realising that i have to work for the rest of my life. like, what if after i graduate, i realise that i don't like what i'm doing. okay, my day just got a bit better cos pretty kim just gave me a slice of damn good homemade carrot cake. (: omg yay. ya, i miss school. i just want to stay in school and dance and play judo for the rest of my life, seriously. i miss going for training. going to the nationals indiv was so cool cos it brought back lots of memories. we even saw ma jun, yen lin and the girl who played against siti from ny.

anyway, back to the horrids of my life that is teaching and teaching, i went into a class this morning and was really bad at teaching i bet they didn't learn anything today cos i was so blur and tired that i forgot all the stuff i was supposed to teach, and it didn't help that i didn't have my powerpoint slides. and the thing is i taught them quite straightforward stuff today (ie. formation of deltas, distributaries, floodplains, levees & uses of rivers) so then i didn't know what to do and i was like shit. i had to refer to my notes and practically just read out loud. but 3/5 rocks lah they were so nice and just talked to me and was so encouraging. i really love my students but it's just me! i dont know why i just can't do it. i don't have the talent for this. maybe i have a bit... but i've been so pissed lately that i've successfully convinced myself that i don't. (the carrot cake is helping though...)

yeah so i'm at school now. a bit mixed with regards to my feelings for ij. after realising that the tentative date of jac yip's return is 7 april ie. next monday ie. my birthday, i got hit by this sad bug. i don't really want to leave my kids cos ALL my classes really rock. even the ones that don't like me, they're still really nice people and i love them to bits. but i don't want to waste their few years of education.

but what i really really cannot stand is tuition. yes, the kids rock too and i don't want to waste their education and parent's money too but what really draws the line of distinction is sarah the bitch. she's an insult to ij girls everywhere. she's a snob who thinks she's so great just cos she's got a little more experience (shouldn't she be in uni now?), who flirts with guys 23o839 years younger than her, which is just disgusting. she bosses people around and threw my best friend out of the centre. like, who gave her the authority, willis wasn't even there. and she has absolutely no sense of humour, okay! (said to the rhythm of patrick's "it's not my problem okay!") then she sits in my lesson, i don't know whatever for because my evaluation is not even this week, it's next week. and i'm praying that i fail the evaluation or i'm gonna just ask them to let me go. i don't even want to go to work next week cos its my birthday (yay!) and darling rachel won't be here. i miss her already. miss taiwan. but that's not important. ya anyway, so she evaluates this unnecessary thing then tells me how i need to improve (which i do need to "improve", no fault in that... except i was trying to teach un-funly when she was there. when she left, we had a ball. seriously.) so whatever, so that's not the annoying part. the annoying part was she actually was teaching me how to raise my voice like i'm some sort of dummy who doesn't even know how to do that and the would like perk her eyebrows up and look fierce but actually that just makes her look more piggy-ish. and act all authoritative with this deep voice that makes her look very scary. but she insists that works in getting their attention so they really know you mean it or whatever. i have no problems controlling the class via assertion but i just don't enjoy teaching okay?

so i really think, no, KNOW that i'm gonna quit that dumb place. even though some people like min hao and andrew are nice and i'm always the bitchy one cos im always "tired" (i really have to drag my ass out the door to go for tuition so i'm happen to always be unhappy when i go there), so i totally understand if they hate me. but it's just... teaching is not my thing. in case you all didn't know that, let me emphasize. teaching is not my thing. but i still love kids, more than ever. especially cute fadzes. (: oh by the way, my wonderful sister the good influence told me to "ditch the kid and go watch horton" which i really wanted to do. and ya i have to watch horton soon before it flies away. (sondra!!!!)

so... sorry, sarah, since you're so great at teaching and can look fierce all, you can take over my sessions and show off to everyone, im sure you'd enjoy that. the english teacher who speaks singlish, what a wonderful catch. cos you know we all "respect" and "admire" you and your bitch face and attitude. have fun being a slut paedophile. in hope that next week will be my last time seeing you... see ya, don't wanna be ya!

the best concert everrr!

dear readers,

not that there're many... but since i'm hopeful,

let me tell you all that THE MAROON 5 IT WON'T BE SOON BEFORE LONG BEFORE ASIAN TOUR WAS THE BEST CONCERT EVERRRRRRR!

yes, sondra, please nod incessantly now.

have a few pictures but too lazy to post them now. anyway, they're all just mainly sondra, me and a bunch of pink hands.

anyway, yeah! the whole entire indoor stadium was up on their feet dancing (as was i) throughout the entire thing! we were having so much fun, we didn't even realise that we had been dancing for over an hour non stop and they had sung almost every famous song and some less famous ones for so long that it was the end of the concert.

everyone was still screaming and shouting "i love you"s in the dark AFTER the band went off stage that they had to come back and play their encore she will be loved. omg they're really damn good. adam levine was on pitch even though he sang like 20 songs non stop and played his guitar as well. he even sang the kanye west song and sunday morning (ahh!) and yes he sang many songs from songs about jane (yay!). the drummer was so fantastic man, he was rocking sweat. wow, that night was really really really good.

okay, if you all are jealous of me now, don't worry. let me tell you how i've been dreading my jobs, yes not just job, but jobS. because for some dumb reason (dumb being christy) i've undertaken two jobs that are nearly exactly the same, THEN i realised that i absolutely hate the jobs.

it's not that teaching is a bad job, it's just that I am not cut out for teaching. absolutely not. no way. how do i know this? well, first of all, i DREAD going to work, i dread doing the stuff for work, even if they're just powerpoint slides or photocopying worksheets. it sucks even more because i can't connect with one or two classes and things get REALLY bad when you're around kids who don't like you. at least if they quite like you, you enjoy going to classes and hanging out with them and you get it better cos the kids respect you enough to at least hear you out. but nooooo, i mean it's not possible to have all your classes like you, i know, but it's just doubly / triply / quadruply hard when they do.

i miss those days odd-jobbing at starhub and having a lot of time to chill and go to the gym. :( i actually liked going to all my past jobs. i'd rather go to a small office at the hotel ten times more than going to school/tuition everyday. sigh, i liked it much better when i was the student. maybe this is retribution for my bad student behaviour when i was in secondary and jc. damn. i just thought it was simple because the hours and the pay is not bad but just to tell you all, the work is three times more than the amount they pay you.

okay, i'm just ranting but yeah i really can't stand it anymore! i didn't think i'd ever say this but jac yip, please come back to school!

something, please save me now. i beg you. i really hate my job.